Ghost Island: Boo or Boo-urns?

Pictured: Brandon Quinton, 2018.

Summer used to be such a bittersweet season for me. Sure, the weather was nice and I didn’t have to go to school, but we had to endure a nearly-four-month drought of new Survivor episodes. Big Brother and DVDs of old seasons just weren’t adequate thirst-quenchers. It was upsetting.

But these last two spring seasons draaaaaagggged. Both started off strong but limped to the finish line (albeit with record-breaking finales, for better or worse) and I couldn’t wait for them to end. Maybe it’s because their conclusions coincided more or less with Continue reading “Ghost Island: Boo or Boo-urns?” →

2002: It’s Getting the Best of Me

2002

Airdate: February 18, 2010
Boot: Stephenie LaGrossa
Quote: “Alright, great, you’ve been a winner your whole life? I doubt it. I’d love to tell him what a winner is and what a loser [is] and where he fits into that…equation.” – Tom Westman, on James
Rating: 9 + Tier A (5) = 14

This is the fifth episode I’m reviewing–from five different seasons, mind you–and the third that features Boston Rob. Frankly, given how many times the guy has played I’m surprised he isn’t in six of the first five episodes I review. It’s like Survivor whiplash, going from domineering manipulator Rob in the Redemption Island endgame to cocky underdog Rob in the All-Stars premiere to sensible voice of reason Rob in this second episode of Heroes vs. Villains.

Stuck on the “buffoon tribe” for a third time, Rob has to exert himself in order to keep his lazy, uncooperative team functioning. But his newfound gallantry proves to be Continue reading “2002: It’s Getting the Best of Me” →

1203: Crazy Fights, Snake Dinners

Airdate: February 16, 2006
Boot: Misty Giles
Quote: “Bruce is incredibly neurotic.” / “Courtney is a lunatic.” – Shane Powers
Rating: 6 + Tier B (4) = 10

In recent years, the Survivor producers have displayed a love for pointless alliterative labels, whether it’s Brains vs. Beauty vs. Brawn or Heroes vs. Healers vs. Hustlers. Had Survivor: Panama – Exile Island been filmed in the modern era, it probably would have been called Trainwrecks vs. Traditionalists, because that’s pretty much the way the tribes were divided after a swap in episode two. Casaya was clearly the more entertaining group, which led to a bit of a Sophie’s choice for the pre-merge run. A Casaya victory meant that more of these delightful oddballs would live to see another episode. That’s good. But it also meant Continue reading “1203: Crazy Fights, Snake Dinners” →

801: They’re Back!

Airdate: February 1, 2004
Boot: Tina Wesson
Quote: “They could think I’m just cocky and arrogant and think I could last the whole game. Hmm, imagine that.” – Richard Hatch
Rating: 10 + Tier D (2) = 12

The universe and Google’s random number generator have thrown me a bone here and allowed me to review one of my absolute favorite episodes of all time. I realize that I’m defying all the rules of Survivor fandom by Continue reading “801: They’re Back!” →

2213: Too Close for Comfort

2213

Airdate: May 11, 2011
Boot: Ralph Kiser (eliminated from Redemption Island); Grant Mattos
Quote: “He’s pathetic. He’s crazy. Not the n-word crazy, he’s just crazy.” – Boston Rob, on Phillip
Rating: 5 + Tier E (1) = 6

After subjecting myself to an episode of Worlds Apart to begin this project, the randomizer graciously decided my second episode would be from…Redemption Island? Come on. Is the universe trying to tell me not to do this? If the next three episodes are from Cook Islands, Caramoan, and Continue reading “2213: Too Close for Comfort” →

3011: Survivor Russian Roulette

3011

Airdate: April 29, 2015
Boot: Shirin Oskool
Quote: “I don’t want to take anything away from Shirin, but I’m an adopted child.” – Dan Foley
Rating: 8 + Tier D (2) = 10

We kick things off with an episode of Worlds Apart, which is strongly making me rethink this whole project. Do I really want to sit through an episode of this horrid season again, especially one from after Continue reading “3011: Survivor Russian Roulette” →